I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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