so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Randomize
