her vagine was all disorganized.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
