Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
