Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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