honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
If I die, sorry about rent.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Randomize
