I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
