Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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