All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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