the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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