dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
