I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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