you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Someone shattered a urinal.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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