Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize