he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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