that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
