i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
