maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
