wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
