Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
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