great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
