so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
