All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
