I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
