once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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