i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
