Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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