Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize