I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
