OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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