Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Go christen that room with your naked body.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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