Having a random hookup so left but love u
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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