Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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