But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize