Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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