just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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