That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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