we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
