wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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