you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Drunk is not a location!
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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