those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
