So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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