do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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