I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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