69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
he had hair everywhere except his balls
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
