so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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