was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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