Dual....:-)
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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