Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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