but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
